A child in us

"A happy person is the one who can see beyond imperfection, and accept it as the beauty of life itself"

I miss being a kid..

My babies!

Got these pics today sent from Ditha!
my babies!! omg miss them so much...
they look better than ever, aren't they ? :)

That's Chief - Kim - Chief.. xxxxx

Feel satisfied :)

Today not bad :)
feel quite productive working in lib! did fungi..fungal..fungus..omg
Nice lunch at OC! + yummy choc/buttery croissant for desert/supper frm food/cherry coke hunting wit meiting, due to sheer boredom of revising..

Went to Manda's place a bit frm lib, as usual, talking2x wit her thr her window while i was waiting for the C3 bus to tk me home..can't b bothered to walk since its damn cold. pretty funny lol, since she was talking thr her bedroom window, then Pat also talked thr d living room window, and I was standing outside her flat. Not sure yet wht our plan is for Irma's bday this sunday..hmm..thinking might go n tk her clubbing since she wanted to go clubbing since ages ago, but none of us feel like going clubbing that time..
or..might go to her place in midnite..?
dunno yet..

ow..and wrote my resignation letter for VUE today..feel quite sad, but well anyhow, pretty sure nxt yr can find another part time job. I've mentioned to Magda, elena, n a few other dat i'll b leaving..they seem pretty surprised, since i just like started working there 1 month ago. manage to reassure them tht its bcos i need to go back home & egypt volunteering thingy ..not bcos i dun like working there :)

One last thing, yesterday was browsing thr frienstr..then found out tht lyss is goin out w sumone now! omg, can't believe it..for me i think i would always see her as my little sister! she's actually 16 this yr.. known her since she was 7 yrs old! (still remember those times, both of us just started learning how to ride.. had jumping lessons tgther..sleepover at her place/tasha/mine/putri/jeanne/sammy's place every weeknd.. all of us used to b so close tgther back then. Even tho our age range frm like.. 20-7 yrs old, but we spent every single minute in the stable every weekend.. lunches together/groom the horses/bathe them/gossiping in competitions..
then after Trijaya's management fell apart, we started to move to different riding clubs..and only saw each other during competitions). Me, put, n tash were still get together every now and then when I'm back home. Last summer we met up and rode together like we always used to do back then..had so much fun trying putri's new horses! ..shd do tht again this summer really.
Anyhow, yeap can't believe now she's actually alrd grown up! still rem how when we had sleepover tghter, lyss will always b d one who cuddles/snuggled close to me..
gonna go and drop her a mssg soon !

De javu

just grab this pic frm artati's blog..omg, these were 4 of us 1st yr in concord!
dunno looking at this pic made me feel damn nostalgic!

Advice given

K, seems like i've been blogging damn often these 2 days..
but anyhow..

Got a mssg frm a friend of mine 2day, n he goes on and on complaining abt how he's so stressed out nowadays..(which he did every so often).
Basically, frankly the main problem is that his parents controls him almost completely ! and he kept on and on complaining how they don't let him do wht he wants. eg : studying music.
but, they DO let n support him in pursuing his musical interest : joined a band/national orchestra/jazz performances/classical recital..oboe/flute/saxophone lessons..etc
so, why he kept on complaining?
I told him that he's LUCKY to get a chance to do all that..music..which he loves.

Also told him tht even tho his relationship with his parents wasn't exactly great..but anyhow, they're still his parents and I know (ps : i do know his parents) that they meant well. I just wish he will realise how lucky he actually is.

Advice given

K, seems like i've been blogging damn often these 2 days..
but anyhow..

Got a mssg frm a friend of mine 2day, n he goes on and on complaining abt how he's so stressed out nowadays..(which he did every so often).
Basically, frankly the main problem is that his parents controls him almost completely ! and he kept on and on complaining how they don't let him do wht he wants. eg : studying music.
but, they DO let n support him in pursuing his musical interest : joined a band/national orchestra/jazz performances/classical recital..oboe/flute/saxophone lessons..etc
so, why he kept on complaining?
I told him that he's LUCKY to get a chance to do all that..music..which he loves.

Also told him tht even tho his relationship with his parents wasn't exactly great..but anyhow, they're still his parents and I know (ps : i do know his parents) that they meant well. I just wish he will realise how lucky he actually is.

Earthquake

I was cooking lunch just now.. when I saw the news on BBC : "Breaking news : 2,782 killed as an earthquake of 6.2 magnitude strikes in Java, Indonesia this morning"
I was like..wht d h*ll?!?
so, after a quick search on the net, found out that this morning (Sun, 27th may)..a massive earthquake strikes in the capital city of middle Java, Yogyakarta.

The worst part hit is the southern part of the city and another area, Bantul, also south of the city.
Called artati, thx god his grandfather is ok (he lived there).
Called my mom to check if none of our family members were hurt or sth..none thankfully. Only my driver's family house were hit by th quake, but none of his famil
Called my friend's sister to check if she's ok (she lives there as well)..luckily she's fine as well..her car broke down in the middle of the city, and she saw a lot of the injured ppl and the collapsed rubbles of the building/houses/etc.

oh dear..

February ppl

FEBRUARY

(the water bearer)

O Abstract thoughts> Loves reality and abstract>OIntelligent and clever>O Changing personality>O Temperamental>O Quiet, shy and humble>O Low self esteem>O Honest and loyal>O Determined to reach goals>O Loves freedom>O Rebellious when restricted>O Loves aggressiveness>O Too sensitive and easily hurt>O Showing anger easily>O Dislike unnecessary things>O Loves making friends but rarely shows it>O Daring and stubborn>O Ambitious>O Realising dreams and hopes>O Sharp>O Loves entertainment and leisure>O Romantic on the inside not outside>O Superstitious and ludicrous>O Spendthrift>O Learns to show emotions

Dawn

Staring at the darkness outside my window
feeling tired but peacefully happy after work today..
was closing with maggie/ramir, and we actually clean every single visible surface since Magda was the manager on duty today..
oh well..not so bad

Went property hunting/agents searching today with Irma n kote
started at Sloane Sq-Belgravia-Victoria-Pimlico-St.James Park
Arrange viewing for 3 property at this Foxtons agent in Sloane Sq..event tho it's a bit above our budget, but he said can negotiate wit the landlord and very sure we can get it cheaper..

We fell in love with St.James park's area!!! nearby Victoria station..
but it's bloody exp there..even more than sloane sq!
belgravia & sloane sq are v.quiet area..totally residential..
most agents said we're too early, since most of their props are available now..
looks like we're not gonna find anywhere till sept then
hmm

Sanity

I'm so fed up with bio
my brain is saturated..
with plants/rer/bacteria/lipids etc etc
but still, have to continue revising..............................

currently in library..gonna go out to get some food SOON

Nice day!

Today was a good day!
even tho this morning i woke up like..supremely late. :) suppose to meet up w ninghn n alex in lib at 10, woke up at 10.30! broke my record for getting ready+shower etc in abt 8 min! haha..
finally arrived in lib at ard 11ish..
Walked to Egypt consulate at lowndes st.. got a bit lost here n there, found it at last, near sloane st/knightsbridge. This was one of d easiest visa app ever! the form was like only 2 pages..no need bank statement/letter frm college/flight confirmation etc (no wonder egypt is well..a bit dodgy hehe)

After that walked ard a bit again..finally ate lunch at EAT. talked2x for abt 2-3 hrs, feels so good just to sit while eating our lunch & talking2x abt well..lots of things :)
Went back to pick up our visa.. actually got more lost this time, end up noticing cars/license plates! due to alex's fetish 4 cars lol..
Went to Forbidden Planet & Covent Garden in search of peixuan's bday pressie.. finally found it in cov.garden, cute pink piggy speakers!!

Revise a bit in library..meiting/michael/nina were there...went back ard 11ish..feel so refresehd today!! actually my brain really does feel like it works better tonite after doing nothing for the whole afternoon.. :)

Btw..another addition, found out that there's this human disorder bcos of gene mutation that causes the whole family to walk on all 4 (baby crawl-ish)..disturbing images!
and.. oh, really need to remind myself not to think too much sometime.
seriously, i think the more time i spent alone, the more i started to think abt everything..which didn't actually makes me sad/happy/depressed or anyth, but it just..tiring ..sometimes just to stone & empty ur mind is really good. i think i need my weekly horse dosage to clear up my overloaded brain.. maybe will go to the stable on sunday morning :)
Oh and my cold is much better now! plus weather today was damn nice!
ok, gtg sleppp........

Sick

Oh well..
today wasn't so bad.. woke up this morning not feeling very well at all..think i'm coming down with a flu + sore throat. Hope it is not mumps!!! got this email frm IC health centre saying that there's been a few cases of mumps recently in college & suggest the ppl who hasn't yet got MMR vaccine twice to go there and got vaccinated..oh dear

Was planning to go run in Hyde park this morning, but since woke up feeling sick..decided to sleep in more and woke up ard 8. Rushed to school in bloody rain.. the bus was pasked as usual. Only have 1 lecture today!
Got 2nd yr options talk at 11 !! so exciting.!!
makes me want to go to 2nd yr alrd!!
but still have to pass these exams..*sigh*..dunno why but i actually felt calmer in revising lately..even tho am still not v.confident in a lot of the things, esp. cell bio & biochem!
I think studying in lib is really productive!! hehe.. wit meiting/starbucks/choc/sweets..

Went to gym today..
enjoying myself actually, since it was like ages ago since i went to the gym!
Gonna go sleep earlier tonite n hope tmr will feel better :)

Rainy morning

Just came back home from work
It's like.. 2.30 am now. and i'm typing this while staring out of my window ..looking at the rain falling on the dark, deserted street in front of my building.
Hmm..
Work wasn't so bad today. Got a ncie surprise when I came, Magda told me that I was in concession today :) which was good..initially suppose to work in floor (and I know i'll just die of exhaustion, esp tonite is the release of da vinci code).
Man, it was crazy..every single screen showing da vinci code was packed! as in..completely packed !!
Got this one rude/weirdo customer..lucky manage to turn him away.
Also met Jaclyn, Keith, Pat..they were all watching da vinci code..but all of them said it wasn't as good as they had expected. I guess what Ann said is true, when she watched a new movie, she always have no expectation at all. So, when the movie is good, she's happy..if not then fine, bcos she didn't expect anything at the beginning anyway.

I guess that's a pretty interesting way to look at life really..sometimes a few years ago when I used to compete, when the competition was really huge & all my opponents were older/more experienced/got better horses than me..mostly I went in and got no expectation whatsoever. really. and sometimes I won, and i felt truly happy..if I lost, fine.
anyway, gtg sleep now...exhausted.

damn..!! it dissapeared!

damn..!! it disappeared!

Ok ok

i just wrote a damn long lonnggg entry in "32 more days", then I clicked publish post, and the whole damn text just dissapeared!
not good
seriously not in the mood to rewrite what i wrote again

To sum it up :
- went for dimsum, celebrated Ziyang's bday today..fun!! finally a proper meal beside sandwich shop & starbucks vanilla latte :).

-got my badly needed horse-dosage..! haha..tried this new, young mare, Macey. Grey, 6 yrs old. V.nervous but actually very sweet as she tried real hard to do what I asked her to do, just that her muscles are not strong enough to do all the collection..also needs to work on her canter a LOT. enough speed, just not enough power from her hindquarters. so damn different, if I rode kim, her hindlegs power are just amazing! can jump a 4-foot fence from almost a stand-still. miss her terribly.

-went home, slacking .. got no mood to revise (can't, just can't work in my room). Chat wit Manda n tephi..found out she broke up w her bf alrd..o well..Anyhow, tmr gonna meet artati for lunch! can't wait hehe

32 more days

Quote

"Human being is destined for many things, but loneliness is not one of them"

Make my own way

When I was brushing my teeth just now..suddenly it just occurs to me that now I had really living the life I really want to :
1. I'm in uni studying Bio..in London
2.I work part-time in a cinema every weekend
3.I volunteer as a stable hand in westway stable
4.I live alone and indepently (not financially, but well..alone and managing on my own hehe)
5.and most important : i got lots of my beloved friends here!! :)
6.and for addition : I'm going to Egypt! doing marine ecology ! *fingers crossed for this one really*

So, life is truly pretty good..I'm 20 and well one thing I realise, it IS you and ONLY you yourself who can decide what you want to do with your life..and if you know what do you want, well do it! otherwise, if you did not do what u truly want..and just doing things that ur parents WANTS you to do..u'll only end up blaming them in the end I guess.
Lucky for me, my parents really let me decide by my own what I want to do.. thx mom & dad ! :)

Feel refreshed!

K, haven't wrote in a few days..not bcos I was too busy, more like bcos I was slacking! hehe..
Last Wed-Thurs-Fri the weather's been damn nice!!!!!
Can like, sunbathe every 10-11am break + lunchtime.. lying on the grass in Queen's Lawn!! sooo relaxing lol. Can't believe they even plan to build sth ON Queen's Lawn! no pls.. it's like the only green spot left in IC :(

Wed : watch MI3 wit Ninghan, alex..junk food fiesta! chips/guacamole/popcorn..
talk2x at Brogan's pub till pretty late.. haha got debate bwn near neutral vs neutral evolution!

Thurs : Went jogging in Hyde park at 7am in the morning!!! Omg, it feels damn good..wit Anikha & Mimi. Can't believe how I used to woke up at 6 and jog at 7an every single day back in concord! Hardly did anymore since I'm here..mostly just jog in the afternoon ...only got time to jog in the morning every weeknd. Missed it actually. I think exercising in the morning really wakes me up,like totally..shd try do that a bit more often nxt week ;)

Fri : nothing much..work in Lib..lying on grass..work at Box at nite..
Sat : today : got GREAT NEWS in the morning from Dad !! Kim n Chief had a double clear round today!! (fyi : they're both competing this week, Steven rode Chief, Ferry rode Kim).. feeling mighty proud like a parent!! I miss competing & exercising them so much !! am a bit horse-deprived lately..
Then tonite, work as usual..after that went to Lloyd's Bar (I almost can't get in..! looked to young , lucky i got my railway card, which got my birthdate n photo). Went there wit almost everyone frm work : Magda was damn crazy when dancing, also Tania, Bee, Juan, Pablo...Maggie was so cute wit all her antics! farewell for Anton who'll go back to his country nxt week :(
I'm gonna really miss them nxt yr!! hope when i came back here nxt yr, they still hv a vacancy for me if I reapply ..its quite rare u know, to get colleagues which are all so nice..actually back in concord when I work, all of my colleagues were really2x great as well..miss them..wonder how Nade, Shane, Sarah, Jo, Rita etc are doing now?? hmm..which reminds me that I need to call Heather nxt week, gonna ask her how Amble is doing in her competition recently.
k, gtg sleep now..my sleep hour is totallly messed up these few days!

Unexpected

got msg frm Bagus, asking abt Arif..which surprised me a LOT!
wahh..haven't heard frm him in ages..
still remember, it was like, 1o yrs ago when all of us used to have riding lessons with om James every week..still remember how proud we felt if we learnt a new techinque, jumped high fences, worked in perfect harmony wit our horses/ponies, as if we're 2 creatures with one mind..
omg, miss those times!!!!

Me & Mendut, Bagus & Laser, Arif & Aquila, Tiff & Miracle, Sandra & Oklahoma.. those were the days. Can't imagine it was like alrd 10 yrs ago!!! omg..remember that time how i used to looked up to Arif & Tiff which were both 13 & 17 dat time..totally admire their riding skills. now i'm alrd OLDER than them!!

Anyway, feeling v.productive today! worked in lib wit Meiting, coffee totally works!! feel so alert.. haha
gtg sleep now (trying to)
...Got haircut tmr!!!...

time

"Do not let the time that the Lord gives you run on as if everything were due to chance"
.Johannes Paulus II.

A flash of thought

Just got back frm work.
Something elena said today make me think..she went back to Bologna wit German (pronounced : Herman btw) last week. It's the 1st time she brought him to meet her family & she said her momn grandma has fallen head over heels in love wit him, and even when they left to go back to london..they almost cried. So sweet. what she says that makes me think is dat she really likes him is not just because he respect her family, but how he repect his own family.
And in that flash of second, I had decided that I'm gonna look for that quality in a guy which i'm hopefully gonna marry someday. :) hehe. but it is true, really.. How he treats his family is the same way he's gonna treat you.

So, girls out there, pls keep this in mind !!

Anyway, lately my life is such a routine.. think i'm now in the very motivated mood to revise! it's the same like last yr, before a levels. It's like every single free minute I have, I feel like revising. Seriously, but somehow I start to really find a joy if I'm revising the subjects that I love, eg : Animal behaviour, evolution, plants physiology, flowers, virus and bacterias, immunity ...I'm happy knowing that I had gain more knowledge every single day :)
K, gtg sleep .

Run

"Look at how much running have we done as a species, but we keep staying at the same place until now"
copied this frm some bio txtbook, make sense when i 1st read it..now dun really..haha omg, i'm getting too bored revising!

Revision calculation

REVISION = NO FAIL

NO REVISION= FAIL

REVISION + NO REVISION = NO FAIL + FAIL
REVISION ( 1 + NO ) = FAIL ( 1 + NO )
------------------------------------------------------------ divided by ( 1 + NO )
REVISION = FAIL

Gyahaha..got this from Baim, which he created during exam stress lol :)
neways, had a nice super long run to Battersea Park just now (since can't stand to revise / do my essay anymore..arghhh..).
It was damn nice!! shd go there again sometime, nxt time will grab ninghan or artati to come along hehehe...
Looking at ppl just walking2x ard, sitting on the benches, dog and kids playing..is more than enough to make me feel fully recharged and refreshed, ready to go back for another longgg and boringg revision session.
Often when I see / went somewhere nice here..makes me want to share it so much wit my dear friends & family back home!! I know opa & oma will love the parks, dian will absolutely loves oxford st, inka will love all the cafes, yaya will love the parks etc..
hmm

Random thoughts

Sometimes you think that you got it all figured out..
but then often you're wrong.
Nothing is as simple as it seems..hmm..lately this person confused me more.