Visiting mom..

Yay currently in Singapore :) visiting mum. doing lots of shopping and eating :)

the weather is damn humid! omg just walking to the bus stop makes me damn sweaty alrd but not bad, everywhere i go meet people then always got treated with lunch and dinner hehe

I've been satisfying myself with eating lots of snacks and ice drinks! by comforting myself that i wont get these foods in uk :)

Memories.

I cannot let go of memories easily.

Imagine if humans have the ability to erase and retain certain memories..will life be more convenient that way? or does memories exist because their presence makes the person we are now?

London Zoo :) !!

Ice cream at the zoo (despite the windy and grim weather)

Girrafe (girraffe?) has THE most beautiful eyelashes, I swear. and they look so docile, cant believe they are actually can be more violent than a horse..which is the reason human cant domesticate them

a very cute butt of an Okapi! i thought it was a zeedonk at first (a zeedonk = a cross between a zebra and donkey, and yes it does exist)

Tour de France, when they had this french village thingy in Hyde Park.. (= lots of french snacks)

err..never mind me. but the sky above is not a bad picture rite :)

I got a sore throat and slightly runny nose..and my flight is in less than 24 hours. not a very good news, but i'm happy indeed. Finally time to go back home!! Also yesterday I had a really good time in London Zoo!! I cant believe i didnt go there before.. its not a spectacular zoo or anything, ive been to some bigger zoos with more animals before, but I really had fun watching the animals. Just stand there and watch the girrafe walked slowly, docilely.. watched the gorilla sit still.. the (ew) anaconda snake try to eat its dinner (a mice, double ew). Although i feel like slapping some of the visitors sometime who uses bright flash to take pics of the animals, or who kept knocking or talking loudly around the cages! Each animal got their own caretaker, so the caretaker gets to know their animal really well.. it sounds like a fun job :) it shouldnt be too different than being a groom or owning a horse rite, basically u should clean their shit, feed them, and get to know them well so if they are sick..or look off, you can tell instantly. I imagine it will be nice to have this kind of connection with big//'wild' animal maybe? imagine having the same bond or trust you used to have with your horse, but this time it is with a girrafe or an elephant maybe? Thanks mimi for the free tickets!! :) :) and I love, love my new haircut! she's one of the very few hairdresser who manage to cut my look-straight-but-actually-wavy hair nicely :) (tambahan bwt ti, iyah yang tkg cuci rambut lutju yahh heheh..)

Huh..
I feel so shitty today
I want company, but at the same time i want to be alone
I want to go out and shop, but at the same time i dont feel like shopping
I want to eat, but at the same time i dont want to eat

.............................
argh.
seriously whats wrong with me, stupid weather maybe?

I found a course i would totally love to do for masters!!
finally. its the first time i actually feel motivated and feel like I got a new goal to reach!
excited. still need to look for more details, but from a brief overview..it is a course that is perfect for me. totally me.
and my supervisor just ask us out for lunch tomorrow as tmr is my last day. so nice.. .. .. :)

And soon i really should be able to find out the answer of this nagging thought which has been bothering my mind these past few months. I'm going back home, back to where you are. yay

J.K Rowling is amazing !!
I've just finished re-reading the last harry potter book for the second time in four days.
one word, simply AMAZING :)

Today I finished so many errands! went riding and say goodbye to Loki..literally rush back home, then dashed out again to get stuff that people asked me to buy and bring back home.
I still need to find cat's claw..

Cardio(s)..

Yay! going home soon, very very soon :) :) !!

London is not too bad these days

Work was great..not in the term that i did too many useful things really, but the colleagues been wonderful, and i've discovered LOADS of new eating places that are scattered outside central London thanks to Carina :)

plus the long lunch breaks // shopping in sloane street..

and the usual discussion of korean dramas.. with the occasional real work to do with the hearts.

After working there for awhile, i'm getting more used to the term of..err.. death. Well, lets see..a typical day starts usually with reading tons of post-mortem (a.k.a reports they made after you died) and autopsy reports. Then continued with looking at heart samples or photos of hearts from various babies or childrens.. some with notes attached that it needs to be returned to the body somtime soon. Then most of the day will be filled with filing all those hearts with different defects into the suitable categories and coding them basically. So.. for example, lines like these are very commonly found.. 'died at ..am/pm', 'unable to resuscitate', 'died while going to the bathroom'..or even more tragic 'collapsed on the street'.. etc.

Sometimes I tried putting myself in the shoes of the people who actually knows these children.. their parents, their friends. They must be miserable. Whilst as doctors, these are all daily cases for them to treat.. say, if you are a banker, then you deal with you client's money..a hairdresser deals with hairs, a teacher deals with different students, well..a cardiologist deals with hearts and someone's life literally. A pretty heavy responsibility.. obviously.

Sekilas saja..

Sepertinya gw banyak melakukan hal-hal bodoh deh belakangan ini, tapi kemajuan loh dgn diri gw yg skarang..gw berani utk fix yg uda gw bikin. Kadang2 gw ampe heran sendiri, sejak kapan ya gw jadi punya keberanian kya gini? ajaib kalo dipikir2..biarpun daridulu, gw bukan orang yg takut untuk lari dari kenyataan sih..tapi akhir2 ini gw suka heran dan takjub ama diri gw sendiri. Bagus sebenernya, tapi kadang gw mikir..knp gw bisa sgt sgt bodoh yah? tapi yang bikin gw seneng, entah kenapa biarpun bego..tapi gw puas dengan keberanian dan..mm..kedewasaan diri gw untuk deal dan nerima hal-hal yang dulu mungkin masi ga bisa gw terima :)

I've learnt something today, i've learnt to be more me.. in spite of everything.

Lovely London

These days i feel like i'm getting to know this lovely city all over again :) For the past 2 years living here, i've been getting used to always shop, eat, and hang out at the same places but these past few weeks of summer has really been interesting. I went to visit and experience lots of things that London has to offer. I always know there are lots of things and events going on here, but just cant be bothered to go and visit them. This summer since i have lots of free time and people to accompany me to go.. :)

Borough market on a Saturday morning, the variety of food and lots of cheese to taste!..

Hyde park to watch the Tour de France, plus a visit to the french food market :) with churross//chocolate sauce ..

Lying on the grass whilst simply talking about everything..

Wandering around the small cafes in Kings rd (ive passed kings rd tons of times, but never bothered to actually really explore it before)..

Watching Mamma Mia the musical yesterday, it was AWESOME! (do believe me, me who actuall fell asleep in the middle of Phantom of the Opera and Chicago). At the end of the show, everyone was on their feet, clapping and singing along to ABBA songs,,such as Dancing Queen and Mamma Mia. GO and WATCH this musical!! it is GOOD!!!

and even now, me, miriam & saira went to ate Four Seasons.. then we wander around Bayswater and Queensway area, i never knew they had so many egyptian//middle eastern stalls and shisha cafe there, similar to Edgaware rd and reminded me of Cairo, when me and ninghan got lost and stumbled upon this dodgy looking market (forgot the name now).

I love London, simply do :)

The summer(s)

Exactly one year ago I was in Egypt. Can't believe its been one whole year since that time. I was watching a movie which had this shooting star scene just now, which reminded me of the times we all laid down on our backs and just watched endless shooting stars every night..after having had a full meal, complemented with mint tea (figured out i can only drank 2 cups max otherwise no sleep for me) and the occasional chance of shisha. I can still remember those moments as cleary as it was only yesterday in my head. Wonderful country, great company :) Its funny how these days, i seem to mark each year by the summer..since its always summertime when things will happen, new places to travel to, friends and family to visit and many more. Last summer was Egypt, which was by far one of the best summer i've ever had, it was so good that i can even classify it as 'those' kind of experience which is once in a lifetime only. Summer two years ago was when I had my first taste of being in a real relationship, which was difficult to sum up in words but in a way had formed me to be the person i am now. It was also the summer i learnt that even someone you thought you knew so well, can never fail to surprise you. I can't recall the summers before that.. but somehow, summertime is always the benchmark for the year for me. So far, this year's summer had been, how i must say..makes me more comfortable to be me. I spent a lot of time in my own company these days, which strangely made me know myself better. I realised most of the times i worry about other people too much, i neglected myself. Catching up with yourself is a good thing :)

Hm not bad not bad..im watching why why love just now, and as Carina said, it was as good, maybe even better than DBY :) ! tomorrow morning im meeting Loki too, cant wait. funny huh, no matter how tired i am, but i seriously dont mind waking up at 5 to go and see him. He's the best in a way that no matter what, he'll be happy to see me. He's constant. Maybe i really should get a pet next year. Goldfish anyone?

The cleaning frenzy

Tireddddd..so very very tired from the constant cleaning and packing ive been doing these past few days. this week been quite hectic i must say. Most stuff packed and stored, ready to be stored tomorrow :)

Being tired means i dont have time to think about stuff that i dont want..or better not..think about, which is yeap good in a way. Yesterday went out with Ti to this cosy little cafe :) came home feeling sort of recharged-ish if u get what i mean. Well, its not too bad actually..its just that i need to sort myself out first, then when i figure out what i actually want..then i'll go for it. rite? i guess in a short time i will see how it goes, whether things are still the same or not since last year. yeap, two more weeks to go.

Akhir2 ini lagi entah kenapa sering kepikiran tentang....yeah tentang kamu. Kamu yang sampai skarang masi belum bisa gw temuin tempat yang cocok in my heart. Kenapa ya, mungkin karena kamu pernah jadi semuanya at least once in my life. Jadi sampe sekarang, gw masi susah utk mutuisn..mau nempatin kamu dimana. hmm. aneh ya, uda lama ga mikirin kamu..tapi beberapa minggu lalu, mendadak kamu dateng lagi dalam pikiran gw.. dan still there ampe skarang. Mungkin karena akhirnya gw sadar, kalo even ampe skarang..setelah sekian lama, kamu bakal tetep jadi seseorang yang sedikit lebih dari temen bwt gw.

The one with the kids

Today was a rather interesting day i must say. Especially since its ONLY Monday, but i'm bloody knackered already. It started off pretty normal, me helping Carina and Dr.Ho and all running their last course. which is hands-on cardiac morphology (yes, hands-ON, not hands-OFF like a certain delegate has refereed to other courses as). Then when i stepped into the office this morning, suddenly i got an assignment to babysit these two cute german kids during my lunchbreak, since their mum is one of the tutor for the course. Sooo...along i went with them during lunchtime to Sloane Sq, regretting all the way why i never continue to learn German. I managed to stutter a few words of german to them, enough to make them understand that 'we are going to the park', 'play there for one hour', 'will bring you back to your mummy after', that sort of thing. Lucky Carina was there with me too, and she's great with children. Too bad David left last week, otherwise me and him can both bring the kids since he, as Carina does, is also good with children. Me? don't ask..children for me are strange creatures. I'd rather have someone ask me to babysit their pets anytime of the day, whatever pet it is. A horse or a dog? yes very much welcome, a rabbit or chicken maybe? sure why not.. a snake, tarantula, spider, or lizard? no problem at all. Yes bring me all kinds of animals, i'd rather watch them compared to kids (human kids of course). Dont get me wrong here, its not like i hate kids.. i dont really. Its just i dont know how to interact with them, how to approach and talk to them. This may sound very weird as most girls or women i know are totally in love with kids.. whilst me..err..no, not really. Kids are not my specialty. Being brought up as an only child, as well being one of the younger generation amongst my cousins has not given me much chance of babysitting younger family members or cousins. Most of my younger cousins are just babies when i left Indo to come to UK..and they hardly recognise me now when i went home for holidays. I gave kids riding lessons, but they are different because they are on horses. Hmm..guess i need to learn how to interact with children more. I never really realised this side of me until today really. a bit funny..and slightly worrying at the same time since i do want to have kids someday, maybe.

A night at the Troubadour

I really like Brent Flood :) they are good! i rarely went to see gigs truly just because i'm simply lazy, even tho there are endless gigs here. but this one, i like! and i know them too, well sort of. Tonight was good, its a night out but not a too tiring one. Its the one where you went back home after work, dressed up a bit, went out then arrived back home sober and before midnight.. so the morning after you will be ready to rise and shine, and go to work.

~Happy birthday man :) !! heheh.. (ti, candid yg diatas kuambil yaa..hehe i like x)

i got a headache,, but the fun part is tonight we're going out to watch brent flood playing in troubadour :) !!! the lead singer reminds me a lot of s cook, really.

Whee.. i just had an interesting lesson on Jack :) he taught me a lot, a lot..cant actually feel my legs now.. the proof that i need to jog more, but the weather so crappy these days.

and last night i read a horsy book before i slept, and i had nice dreams about my horses back home :) how i miss them so.. less than a month's time then i can ride them!!!

Started to get used to my 'work-home-go out-work' daily routine now, i like the feeling like a proper working woman hehee.. even tho my job can be described as, very various, i must say. One day can be given a lot of interesting stuff to do, looking and recording heart specimens and all, and talking to these interesting surgeons/cardiologist etc.. then one day can be given totally easy/boring job like entering data into the database. Overall, i must say the hospital world is very interesting, and its a really refreshing environment for me. Different. :)

My flat shines!! sparkling clean!! in less than 1 hour everything was wiped, vaccumed, scrubbed, and dusted :) :) thanks to hank,hazwan,ritch! hehe even my kitchen was soo clean i dont even want to use it. *sigh* smilling happily..what a productive sunday.